The Ultimate Trick to Achieve Everything in 2020
I bet you have proposed yourself to do a number of activities occasionally, only to end up quitting after a few days. Thoughts like “I am busy”, “I don’t have time” or “I’m not feeling motivated” always get in our way to learn new activities, get healthy and improve ourselves.
And because of that, there are several solutions out there to try to fight this pattern. Some of them include downloading apps with reminders, writing them down on a calendar and even rewarding ourselves to something nice after we have done it.
But even with all these things in place, we still fail to be consistent…
It’s a shame because we all want something really bad. Some of us dream about having a six-pack, some others desire to speak fluent French or would love to achieve the highest level of flexibility that would allow them to perform the most challenging yoga postures.
I came up with an explanation for this situation. The explanation to this can be described in a single word:
Value
We don’t do it because we don’t see the value on it. I am sure you’ve had friends telling you how they like to pay for a gym membership because that’s the only way they get to exercise. They feel they are going to lose their money and therefore are more disciplined with the idea of getting some value out of it.
I know several people that have paid an expensive nutritionist and have followed the diet that the nutritionist gave them with a lot more discipline than they did before paying for it. And the ones who are paying for expensive classes are also more disciplined at attending their lessons.
So… should I pay for every area of my life I want to improve?
First of all, let’s think about money and what makes it so special.
Money has an objective value. Not only has a generic value, but every coin and note tells you exactly the amount of value that it has. Apart from that, money has a universal value. It doesn’t matter if you live in the countryside of Thailand or the heart of Manhattan. The currency of a country will have a different value in another place but regardless of which value, we know it’s worth something because it’s money.
We have a hard time adding value to anything else. We know that our health, for example, has a lot of value. But how much exactly? How much value learning a new language has for you? Does getting a six-pack to hold any value at all? Or losing 6 pounds? The problem is that sometimes we can only see the value when money intervenes and steps in.
And that’s the moment when we say, “There’s no way I am going to exercise regularly without paying an expensive membership”, and put money down for it.
I am sure some classes and activities are worth paying money for. However, there also many other activities that don’t require that financial condition.
A few days ago, I saw a video on Youtube where the guy explained how he keeps himself disciplined. Instead of paying a Gym membership, he made a deal with his friend. For every week he fails to exercise, he will have to pay him $25 as a penalty. This agreement always keeps him meeting his goals and being honest about them.
It’s good to be aware of the money you are ready to pay for your discipline. Do you need to go broke in order to attend the gym? In that case, you may need to consider how important for you are the results you are looking for. Do you need to pay a shitload of money for a nutritionist to stop eating sugar and carbs? The money isn’t helping you eat less sugar, it’s the idea of the money you are losing what makes you feel guilty.
Money has value independently of our circumstances. Feeling tired today? Maybe the idea of learning French doesn’t have that much value for you right now, but for sure money still keeps its original worth.
Why don’t we redirect that value towards the result that we desire? At the end of the day, it’s all about ourselves and the upgrades we want to make in our lives. We shouldn’t need money to constantly decide for us.
I understand however that whilst our minds and moods change and we can suffer ups and downs, money still has a value that stays, survives and persists. When we don’t feel accomplished and happy, the perspective we have of ourselves and our goals fluctuate whilst the value of money stays the same.
But being aware of this reality may help some. Do you want to pay because you need those classes? Or is it just because that’s the only way to push yourself? I find this topic very interesting. What do you think?
Do you find yourself paying for your discipline, or do you pay only for the classes you really need? Paying a friend as a punishment is one of the funniest ways of self-punishment I’ve heard. Would you be up to trying that one?
16 Comments
John Malone
This is a very interesting way of thinking about why people do things, and certainly explains many behaviours from people towards goals, etc.
Loved the article!
Kiira Smith
You are always very encouraging, really appreciate it!
Jamie
It’s all about value and the perception that we have of it.. very profound! I do think that to ‘punish’ yourself in some sort of way can improve a lot how you adhere to a new habit. It is very interesting
Kiira Smith
Thanks Jamie, I do believe that said “punishment” should serve as a technique to make you feel motivated 🙂
Emma Crawford-Nash
I did start going to the gym twice a week and if I didn’t meet my goal, I gave my friend a fiver. It did work well for me, and I only ended paying once or twice throughout the year!
Kiira Smith
Well that worked amazingly well for you, well done Emma!
Karina
Great post, really brilliant.
By the way, I noticed that the icon to your IG on this website doesn’t work. Just wanted to make you aware of it 🙂
Kiira Smith
Thank you Karina!
I’ll sort the IG link now 😉
Victor
I’m a big believer in the power of mental triggers and habits. A mental trigger is something that tells your brain: Hey! It’s time to start that routine! It’s time to start that habit! So on days when you don’t feel like exercising, if you can at least muster up the courage and the strength to just hit PLAY on your favorite workout album, THAT’S a mental trigger, and just watch as that tiny action changes your brain chemistry and your body will then start to want to work out.
Great article, for may people (including me) money (or some sort of punishment) can be the motivating factor!
Kiira Smith
That is an amazing idea! I should create a list of songs that I can play ONLY when I am exercising. I know some people have workout songs in a “Gym Playlist” but I’ve never tried it myself
Thanks for the advice!
Hicham
To me, making habits stick is all about repetition. It may be difficult or feel abnormal or strange at first. But if you keep doing it, day in and day out, it literally becomes second nature.
Humans are absolutely creatures of habit. Whether those habits are constructive or destructive is up to the person.
Kiira Smith
“Humans are creatures of habit”. That’s true. And the older you get, the harder it is to apply new habits to your routine.
I find myself changing habits and routines pretty often though, even when I enjoy them!
Karla
Interesting article. I think that habits need to be exercised conciously.
If you talk to your friends about starting a new habit, they might tell you that you need to exercise self–control or that you need to find a new dose of willpower. I disagree with that.
Getting motivated and trying to remember to do a new behavior is the exact wrong way to go about it. If you’re a human, then your memory and your motivation will fail you. It’s just a fact.
This is why the reminder is such a critical part of forming new habits. A good reminder does not rely on motivation and it doesn’t require you to remember to do your new habit.
A good reminder makes it easy to start by encoding your new behavior in something that you already do.
For example, when I wrote about the secret to sticking to little healthy habits, I said that I created a new habit of flossing by always doing it after brushing my teeth. The act of brushing my teeth was something that I already did and it acted as the reminder to do my new behavior.
Kiira Smith
That theory makes a lot of sense!
Like you said, waiting to be motivated is going to end up in failure. Your example about flossing your teeth is great, you connect the act of flossing to something related that you are already used to do every day. With a reminder like that, you won’t forget to do it.
Thanks for sharing 🙂
Maria
Great article as always.
By the way what do you think about all this Coronavirus insanity? You were based in the UK right? How is it going in there?
Kiira Smith
Pretty bad…I live in London and had to visit 3 different supermarkets yesterday because I needed some toilet paper and it was impossible to find a place with stock.
I went to a big ASDA this morning. There was no toilet paper, no pasta, no rice, only a few cans left of red beans (the most expensive ones) and the entire isle of hand soap and sanitizer gels was completely empty.
There is still plenty of salads, fresh meat and fish though.
It’s scary because the situation is going to get worse and people have started panicking and buying in bulk 🙁